How to: tackle the paralyzing fear of being wrong

QUESTION:

How do I deal with the paralyzing fear that what I am doing is not right, or good, or the best?

AKA how do I start to take action even when I know that that action isn’t going to be perfect, or when I don’t even know what the right action is?

ANSWER(s) from my coaching clients:

<<AKA, mindset shifts to help along the way>>

1. Whatever you are about to say, do, create, decide – it probably matters a lot less than you think it does. In the grand scheme of the world, the people who inhabit it, the infinite decisions and actions made on a moment to moment basis, whatever you are about to say, do, create, decide, however you are about to show up, whatever you are afraid of, it’s not as significant as you think it is. So don’t overthink it. Just do it. 

2. If you don’t try, you are stealing from yourself future progress and growth. I.e. if you don’t write the book, you’ll never get the opportunity to write an even better book, and then an even better book, etc. If you don’t start now, you are just stalling and stealing progress from yourself later.

3. Whatever you’re conceiving to bring to the world, your conceiving it because it is a gift for others. Don’t take that away. 

4. Imagine that you are 95 and on your deathbed – what type of life do you want to look back on? One where you lived in preoccupation with right and wrong, where you took little action, where self-doubt and fear prevailed, or do you want to look back on a life speckled with experiences that grew you, taught you, molded you into an interesting character, allowed you to serve the world authentically and fully, leading a life that could have only been yours?

5. Keep your eyes on your own paper. Nothing will paralyze you more than comparison. When you feel stuck, re-orient yourself on yourself and focus on only your next right step – which is not the ultimate all-encompassing right step, it’s YOUR next best step. That’s the only one that matters and it’s the only one that will get you to where you are going.

6. Find all of the reasons why you must do whatever it is that you want to do. Justify the hell out of it. Build a case and argument for why what you are doing is right (not just for yourself, but for others) – even if it’s delusional. 

7. Actually imagine the worst case scenario and visualize yourself getting through it. It’s probably not going to happen, but know that if it does, you already know what to do and you’ll be fine. Which is really similar to 

8. Answer the question – what if you’re wrong? What if it isn’t perfect? What if no one cares? Don’t just get stuck in the question itself, but answer these questions and realize that the answers are not as scary as we make them out to be, when we are living only in the question. 

9. Practice envisioning the reward to be greater than the risk, and make that reward feel inevitable